(the jaws of marriage)

today over lunch at the potbelly at franklin and randolph, braden, jigglin and i realized that we (the band; our group of six) could conceivably never enjoy the occassion of attending a wedding together, and braden’s not into sharks.

j: “i can’t think of anyone who would invite all of us to their wedding.”

b: “other than you or frazzle*, assuming one of you gets married first. which is different because one guy is the groom, and probably a few of us are in the wedding party. we don’t have a person outside the band.”

d: “this highlights our need for more friends.”

b: “and frazzle says he’s not getting married for a minimum of four years. i wonder how his girlfriend feels about that.”

d: “what he’s actually saying is that he’ll be single in four years.”

b: “ha! he’s pretty much guaranteeing that one.”

j (looks up from his phone): “hey did you hear about that guy who was bitten by a shark and died?”

b: “SERIOUSLY…why would you tell me that? it’s called a PHOBIA; i won’t go in the ocean for like three years!”

j: “that’s RIGHT, i forgot you’re afraid of sharks! i don’t have a phobia…i don’t know what that’s like…you wouldn’t even watch JAWS, right?!”

b: “no! why would i do that…what would make someone with a phobia to sharks watch a movie about a huge predator shark??”

d: “…i think they’re called “balls“.”

*just to clear up any confusion…yes, we do call each other things like frazzle, jigglin, and kizzy. i’ve included a reference guide over on the sidebar.

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